Wow I have been gone awhile lol... 4 months since I have wrote haha

Well it didnt end like I thought from my last post in may, of course we made up haha..im so dramatic. I love him and things are a MILLION times better. . I am not completely obsessed with having a baby now, its weird but it was like ...yes i want a baby but its with him i want the baby so without him none of it matters ya know? And now of course we are not "trying" for a baby but we definatly arent preventing it anymore ;) Amazzing how that works.. but I think I am going to focus on school n hope my eggies are good for another two years lol..plus i got like 3 close friends all due between dec -march...so ill get my baby fill in..or who know maybe ill end up PG now tht im not trying..thts how it works.. ( but i love him so much and we have been getting along perfectly)

Speaking of, i remember my son was conceived by pure miracle..lol no sex in 3 months except ONE TIME i swear to god n bamb, my boobs start hurting i spotted so I marked it up to a period and later found out i was 3 months pregnant..i was so mad at his father ... it was hilarious i remember walking in walgreens and thinking my boobs hurt n i have had the flu for 2 weeks could i be prego? no way, n i picked up the cheapest test n sd god this is a waste of money n took it the next morning and those two lines were BRIGHT..omg i ran out of the bathroom at 5am and threw the wet test at his dad lol...he was asleep on the floor.. ( we were too poor to afford more than a mattress at the time) and i started kicking him n saying how could he... my son n my daughter are amazing tho let em tell ya, i am very blessed, I may have only been 16 and 18 when I had them but they both get all a's, never been in trouble, very polite, and are awesome... there father and i were together for 10 years, we became a couple in 7th grade! He moved in that same year, we lost out virginity together, grew up together, lived through countless deaths, my baby brother (19), his 2 young aunts, his grandma, and his grandpa all were within the same year... it was devastating..we were out on our own but we made it. We were never on any public assistance, i had too much pride for it which now i think is silly we could have had more food than Ramen noodles!! haha...but we were kids raising kids, but we did it... we lasted 10 years n unfortunately i left him. I feel awful sometimes because i broke his heart..but i stayed with him for 5 years after i fell out of love with him because i didnt want to hurt him, then i realized i was hurting him more...he deserved to be loved back... so i let him go. It was so sad because we had been best friends for so long and i didnt know how to live without him but it was selfish of me to hold on... and now he has a new girlfriend who loves him and we get along great for our kids.. we have no custody papers or anything we just split it all, the kids are here part time n there part time n we split all costs...im really lucky to have him as the father of my kiddos...